Running with Scissors

My friend MJ occasionally asks, "Are we running with scissors or an Olympic torch?"

It makes me smile and then makes me think.

We're a few weeks into our new year.  Far enough along to relate this distinction to how we're using our time.
 
"Running with scissors" means using your time recklessly:  filling your days with meetings, conversations and work that keep you busy but blunts your impact.

This habit can hurt you.

Time is currency. Use it strategically and you create the kind of impact you want, squander it away and you don't.

Where can you find opportunities to pare away meetings and activities with a questionable or lower return on your time?

"Running with an Olympic torch" means consciously investing your time in activities that uphold the kind of value you want to provide.

You can do more of this by regularly returning to questions like:
Who do I want to matter to most?
What am I doing now that they value most?
What do I need to be doing now so I'll matter in the ways I want to going forward?

The more time you invest in activities that support your answers to these questions, the brighter your path becomes.

Regifting for Leaders

Regifting is an enduring leadership practice that resonates as the holidays approach.  It involves two simple steps:

    

• Recognize when someone does something that inspires you do do your best.
• Find a way to apply that approach with someone else.

The interesting thing about this practice is that it benefits you as much as others.

• Recognizing when someone treats you in a way that brings out your best means that you're paying attention to leadership style - therefore increasing the odds that you continuously develop yours.
• Finding ways to apply that positive approach with someone else increases your track record of, and reputation for, positive leadership practices.

If you like this form of regifting, you can also apply it on an annual basis:

  

• Each December, make a point of recalling high-points from the prior eleven months, and who helped to make them happen.
• Share these recollections with those that come to mind, and thank them.  

This appreciative tradition extends the impact of the high-points, creating a positive ripple effect. 

Speaking of high points, thank you continuing to find ways to be a more innovative and effective leader throughout 2013 -


Here's to all you'll do and be in 2014!

Here's to You!

I get a kick out of being around people who are smart in different ways than I am - who have different kinds of interests and ambitions and impacts.  

It's invigorating to be around this capacity and learn from these mindsets and skills.

Which means that I'm very lucky - because as an executive coach I work daily with accomplished learners and leaders who like to work as hard as I do.  

They keep me constantly aware of how much more is possible.
  
Many times my work feels like a celebration:  of what my clients have learned and achieved and given to others - and how much more they will going forward.  

So this Quick Note will be my toast to them and to you:

Here's to the game changers

• the ones who persist in finding a better way
• and engaging others in making it happen.

Here's to the connectors

• who build networks that go up, down, sideways, and diagonally;
• who network to learn new perspectives and make new connections
• and who make sure that they give more than take along the way.

Here's to the long gamers

• who've learned that you can often get what you want - but maybe not quite in the way you thought you would;
• who know that if it's a worthwhile goal you persevere until you make it happen.
• Because living other people's goals doesn't work, but joining forces to meet a common goal does.

Here's to the listeners

• who understand how much more there is to really hear,
• who know how to draw out what others have to offer,
• and who make make time to listen for their own wisdom.

Here's to those that surprise themselves

• with what they realize they've accomplished;
• and then get curious, and then determined
• and ready to find out what they'll learn as they take on their next challenge.

Here's to you!

Thoughtful and Thankful

‘Tis the season for giving.  

Luckily, you have just the heartfelt, significant gift to give now and throughout the year.

It’s a sure fire choice that will be valued today even if was already received before.

This time of year is the perfect time to give your thanks - expressing your appreciation specifically and sincerely.

Think about some of the high points of this past year ... who helped make them so?  

Who do you count on for the things that matter most?  

It’s time to say thank you. 

As each of us gets busier, it’s understandable that to-dos can crowd out thank-yous.

But hearing what others appreciate about us energizes and expands, making us feel valued, sometimes even delighted.

And isn’t that the idea behind a gift?

What's Your Big Assignment?

Khol Vinh, former design director at the New York Times, became "internet famous" for his use of grids.  He's now co-founder and CEO of Lascaux Co., makers of Mixel, the world's first social collage app.

In a recent interview he said,

"Becoming an entrepreneur is really about giving yourself a big assignment....If you pick an interesting enough problem and you develop an interesting enough solution you can continue to work on that and spend several years really getting it right."

As a leader, you have the same opportunity to give yourself a big assignment.

Something that will take everything you do best. 

Your big assignment is the impact you hold yourself accountable for having no matter where or with whom or how you work. 

It's interesting and meaningful enough to hold your attention and intention over time.

What others expect of you is important, but what you expect of yourself is more important.  The 'big assignment' you give yourself is how you've decided to measure your success.

As Kohl Vinh pointed out, the point isn't perfection. It's the pursuit.

Our natural talents and developed strengths uniquely qualify us to pursue this big assignment, giving us each the ability to make a difference that matters. 

What is yours?

What's Most Important Now?

You're not getting paid to do things; you're getting paid to recognize and follow through on the most important things.

A simple habit can increase your effectiveness and decrease stress:

first thing, and later in the day, consider everything you have on your plate and choose the one most important thing to accomplish now.

The more you practice this habit, the better you get at it, strategically allocating your time and avoiding traps like

• mistaking activity for achievement.
• reacting to whatever comes your way, which tends to advance others' goals more than your own.
• letting what's urgent crowd out what's important.

Most of us have schedules pummeled by unexpected requests, problems and changes; so choose one or two times later in the day for repeating this practice. Review your goals, commitments and to-dos, take stock of the day thus far, and identify what's most important to complete now.

Considering both personal and professional goals makes it more likely you'll have the energy and relationships you need to really enjoy your accomplishments.

Capitalizing on Conflict

We should use not only

all the brains we have,

but all that we can borrow. -Woodrow Wilson


Conflict signals the opportunity to learn. Your interpretation of another's behavior, message or intent may be correct, almost correct, or incorrect. Your conflicting point of view may be completely accurate, or may need to be updated.

One of the most impactful responses to conflict is listening.

When you recognize a discussion is entering the realm of conflict:

• Stop listening for correctness, or opportunities for rebuttal, and start listening for meaning.

• Summarize, in your own words, the other person's point of view. Ask if you heard it right.

• Wait for an answer. Make sure that a person that starts a sentence gets to end it.

• Don't give up if you don't get it right at first. The greater the distance between your mindsets the greater the opportunity for learning ... and the harder you may have to work.

• Ask what you got right, and what's off base.

• Pay attention to your emotions. A strong response to a conflicting point of view signals that a deeply held belief is being tested or denied. Check to ensure your nonverbals and word choices are helpful.

• Identify what you're learning. Understanding the other point of view doesn't mean you agree with it, just that you're hearing what's meant.

Most of us listen better once we feel understood.

So in addition to creating the opportunity to learn something new, listening in this way increases the likelihood you will be heard in turn.

Uniquely Effective

"You are all unique and special, just like everyone else."
- Margaret Mead, anthropologist

Want to become even more effective?

Get very clear about how well today's work aligns with

• What you know you do best - the things that make you feel strong when you do them; and
• What matters most - the values and drivers that define "good work" for you; and
• The stressors that can push your buttons - triggering behaviors that derail your success.

How can you better understand your strengths, drivers and risks?

• Conduct an informal 360 feedback process, asking people who know you well to describe the most valuable things you do better than others, what they think keeps you motivated and productive, and what may be blind spots for you; or
• Do a self-audit, using a resource like the free Leadership Capital tool; or
• Complete a professional assessment and work with a coach to identify how your profile interacts with your goals.

What can you do once you're clear about your strengths, drivers and risks?

• Each week, spend a little more of your time on activities that use your strengths.
• Every day, work on responsibilities that relate to your interests and values.
• Over time, build habits that help you sidestep derailers while you bring more of your best to your work.

We each have the ability to be uniquely effective. The example we set can help others become so too.

Celebrating Well and Often

Achievement oriented leaders can be quicker to set goals than celebrate progress.

How well and often do you celebrate?

Celebrations are important during good times; and even more important during challenging times.

Taking time to appreciate what you have and what you've accomplished builds resilience, maintains momentum and helps you enjoy success as you create it.

When I asked clients to describe their favorite ways of celebrating, they described

• Activities connecting with friends.


• Closing the door and taking a minute to savor the accomplishment.


• Doing a mitzvah; a good deed for others that extends the good fortune.


• Analyzing what worked best, and replaying it in their minds.


• Going for a walk, playing music, making a toast, saying a prayer....

The most satisfying celebrations reflected their values and personalities. What kind of celebrations do you enjoy most? Who could you celebrate with more often?

Your Leadership Wake

Today's note is inspired by a quote attributed to Hans Sachs, 16C poet, singer and dramatist,

"Mensch, was du tust, bedenk' das End; das wird die höchste Weisheit genennt."

("People, when you do something, think of the end result; that is the wisest approach.")

So, for centuries leaders have been working to "start with the end in mind."

Personal Leadership Link: Every conversation leaves an emotional aftermath - how do you want others to say they feel after spending time with you?

Coaching Point: What habit could you develop to create this kind of impact?